Dem place di chairs at least 1m (3ft) apart – family sidon for one side, church officials for di oda. Evribodi wear facemask.
Evrione know di serious instructions wey di Kenyan goment don put for burials during di coronavirus pandemic.
Only 15 pipo gather for di burial of my cousin, Chris, and everytin need finish by 09:00 local time.
By 07:00 di rest of us gather, in front of our phones and computers, dey watch as di burial dey happun as my friend live-stream am on Facebook.
Hundreds of us watch to pay our last respect to Chris. Im be pipo pesin – di life and soul of family parties.
Im deep laugh go reach you even before e set foot inside di house – in fact, you fit hear am 200m away for gate.
And Chris normally dey show up for pipo, weda na burial or weddings. E sabi ginger pipo for all occasions.
So, on dis day, we show up for am too. But as we no dey dia, e no feel like na di same tin.
‘We no fit play im favourite songs’
Chris na my immediate cousin, but dem raise us for di same house and e bin be more like brother to me.
Im die for Kisumu for western Kenya on Easter Sunday, after e sick for few weeks with liver cirrhosis.
Di goment give us di guidelines for e burial. We gatz bury am within three days.
But with many of e family and friends under lockdown for di capital, Nairobi, no be everybodi fit attend di burial.
Di sermon bin dey short. Di speeches bin dey restricted. And even singing no too dey.
Chris loved music – im play di drum kit for di Salvation Army church band. So e dey painful say nobody bin dey dia to play im favourite songs.
You go like wan watch:
I watch as live comments from e friends and colleagues rolled in on Facebook.
In digital solace, people leave RIP messages and tok of how great a man Chris was.
And I thought, maybe I should take screenshots and print dis out becos dis was essentially our condolences book.
Everytin bin feel so different. We no fit hug, touch or see each other tears. We no fit throw sand on di coffin as dem dey put am for grave.
When pesin wey you love die, we wan cry, look for comfort and closure. But how yo go do dis kind tins wen you no dey dia?
I bin vex. I no ever imagine say I go bury my loved one through social media. I no ever tink say I go want human contact that much. E bin dey like feem, except say I dey part of pipo wey act am.
And sadly, di Facebook Live fail, due to a poor network connection. So I no fit even watch Chris final journey to di very end. I no see wen dem put e coffin down inside grave.
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For many African societies death and life are dey togeda. Many traditions see death as rite of passage – a transition to another form.
Hence why ancestors dey important – dem be di pipo wey don die but kontinu to “live” for di community.
Dis, in turn, mean say wen pipo die dem must receive perfect burial – complete with rituals wey dem don observe for generations.
For di communities for western Kenya wia I come from, like di Luo and Luhya, wen dem born pesin die and wen di pesin die na two important events.
Detailed funeral with 10 different rites
Dem dey treat pesin wey die wit respect and death and burial process dey to follow, to ensure mistake no dey.
First of all burials dem no dey rush burials, especially for old pesin. Pesin death na call for celebration, even though pipo dey mourn and cry.
E dey take at least one week to bury adult pesin. Loud mourning and crying, go last for days. Pipo come togeda to help di family of di pesin wey die to mourn.
Dem go light Bonfire and pipo go gather around dem, embrace, cry, and relive di life of di pesin wey die.
To kill animal dey part of di ritual, and di preparation and serving of food and drinks to console mourners. Na show of unity amongst neighbours and family.
Dem go bring di dead home a day or two before di burial. They lie in di compound, to show say dem accept and love dem, even in death.
Di Luo, a Nilotic people from western Kenya, have among di most elaborate burial customs for Kenya.
At least 10 rites dey involved from the announcement of death, to di removal of di shadow or spirit of di dead from di homestead, to di shaving of family members’ hair, and finally di remembrance ceremonies for di dead.
All dis occasions require pipo to gather and interact in huge numbers.
But during dis pandemic, most of dis rituals are dey off-limits, whether di pesin die of Covid-19 or not.
‘I don only partially grieve’
During di two days between Chris’ death and e burial, dem forbid pipo for house to sing with loud voice for night, becos dem go attract di neighbours wey go want come cry wit di family.
Dem no light any bonfires to sit around. And during di burial, even for grave site, no hugging, or touching, no handshakes or kisses dey allowed.
Goment representatives bin dey dia to ensure say pipo follow di rules f social distancing.
Forty days afta dem bury somebody, dem suppose hold memorial service – di final celebration of dia life. Again, we no go fit do dis for Chris.
I get dis feeling say I don only partially cry for Chris. Dis no be how e for deserve make pipo mourn am.
Maybe wen all dis end – when we fit hug again, and cry for each other arms – we go mourn am like we suppose.
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